Harivansh Rai Bachchan


jiivan kii aapaa dhaapii meN

jiivan kii aapaa dhaapii meN kab waqt milaa
kuchh der kahiiN par baiTh kabhii yeh soch sakuuN,
jo kiyaa, kahaa, maanaa, usmeN kyaa buraa bhalaa.

jis din merii chetnaa jagii maine dekhaa 
maiN khaRaa huaa huuN is duniyaa ke mele meN,
har ek yahaaN par ek bhulaave meN bhuulaa,
har ek lagaa hai apnii apnii den len meN,

kuchh der rahaa huccaa-bucca, bhoNchakkaa saa --
aa gayaa kahaaN, kyaa karuuN yahaaN, jaauN kis jaah?
phir ek taraf se aayaa hii tou dhakkaa saa,
maine bhii behnaa shuru kiyaa is rele meN;

kyaa baahar kii Thelaa-pelii hii kuchh kam thii,
jo bhiitar bhii bhaavoN kaa uhaapoh machchaa,
jo kiyaa, usii ko karne kii majbuurii thii,
jo kahaa vahii man ke aNdar se ubal chalaa

jiivan kii aapaa dhaapii meN kab waqt milaa
kuchh der kahiiN par baiTh kabhii yeh soch sakuuN,
jo kiyaa, kahaa, maanaa, usmeN kyaa buraa bhalaa.

melaa jitnaa bhaRkiilaa rang rangiilaa thaa
manas ke aNdar utnii hii kamzorii thii
jitnaa zyaadaa sanchit karne kii khwaahish thii
utnii hii chhoTii apne kar kii jhorii thii

jitnaa hii birme rahne kii thii abhiilaashaa
utnaa hii rele tez dhakele jaate the
krae-vikrae to Thande dil se ho saktaa hae
ye to bhaagaa bhaagii kii chhinaa chhorii thii

ab mujh se puuchhaa jaataa hae kyaa batlaauuN
kyaa maan akinchan bikhraataa paTh par aayaa
vah kaun ratan anmol aesaa milaa mujhko
jis par apnaa man praan niichhavar kar aayaa

ye thii taqdiirii baat, mujhe gun-dosh naa do
jisko samjhaa thaa sonaa vo miTTii niklii
jisko samjhaa thaa aaNsuu vo motii niklaa

jiivan kii aapaa dhaapii meN kab waqt milaa
kuchh der kahiiN par baiTh kabhii yeh soch sakuuN
jo kiyaa, kahaa, maanaa, usme'N kyaa buraa bhalaa

ma'N jitnaa hii bhuuluuN bhaTkuuN yaa bharmaauuN
hae ek kahiiN manzil jo mujhe bulaatii hae
kitne hii mere paaNv paReN uuNche niiche
prati pal voh mere paas chalii hii aatii hae

mujh par vidhii kaa ahsaan bahut sii baatoN kaa
par maiN kritgyaa uskaa is par sab se zyaadaa --
nav ole barsae, dhartii shole ugle, 
anvarat samay kii chakkii chaltii jaatii  hai

ma'N khaRaa thaa jahaaN kal, us sthal par aaj nahiiN 
kal isii jagah par mujhko paanaa mushkil hae;
leN maap danD jisko ki parivartit kar detii 
chuu kar hii desh, kaal kii siimaae'N,
jag de mujh par faislaa use jaisaa bhaa'e
lekin mae to berok safar meN
jiivan ke is ek aur pahluu se hokar nikal chalaa

jiivan kii aapaa dhaapii meN kab waqt milaa
kuchh der kahiiN par baiTh kabhii yeh soch sakuuN,
jo kiyaa, kahaa, maanaa, usmeN kyaa buraa bhalaa.

The I-Me-Mine Of Life

When did I get time in the I-me-mine of life
to sit somewhere a while to think about
the good and bad in what I did, said, believed

The day my consciousness awoke
I found myself standing in the fair of the world
where every one is lost in delusion
where  every one is caught up in their own give and take

For a while, I was astounded, confounded, dumbfounded --
Where am I? What do I do here? Which way do I go?
But then the force of a torrent, as if, swept me away
And I, too, found myself floating with the tide

As if the tumult outside was less
That inside too emotions worked up a storm
What I did, was what needed to be done out of compulsion
What I said was what burst out of the mind

When did I get time in the I-me-mine of life
to sit somewhere a while to think about
the good and bad in what I did, said, believed

As much as the fair was glittering, gaudy and gay,
the mind had equal measures of weakness
The more I wished to gather
the more limited I found the reach of my hands

The more I longed to stay still,
equally stronger was the force of the tide
Buying and selling can be done with a cold heart
But this was snatch and grab in a stampede
 
Now I am asked -- what can I say?
What pride did I come scattering on the path
What such priceless gem did I find
On which I bestowed my life, my mind?

It was a matter of fate, don't credit or blame me
What I thought gold, turned out to be dust
What I thought was a tear, turned out to be a pearl

When did I get time in the I-me-mine of life
to sit somewhere a while to think about
the good and bad in what I did, said, believed

Much as I might forget, meander or delude myself,
there is a destination somewhere that beckons me
No matter how my feet stumble on ground high and low
I find it coming near me each and every moment

I am blessed by destiny in many ways
but I am more indebted than anything for
the incessant grinding away of the mills of time
whether the skies rain hail or the earth spews out embers

Where I stood yesterday is not the place where I stand now
Tomorrow it would be difficult to find me at the same place
Measure it if you will, but it alters with a mere touch of
the boundaries of nations and time

The world can give on me a verdict such as it likes
But in the unbroken journey,
I pass through yet another facet of life

When did I get time in the I-me-mine of life
to sit somewhere a while to think about
the good and bad in what I did, said, believed

Pathetic, literal, hurried translation by Sundeep Dougal


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Sonny (Sundeep Dougal) Holden Caulfield, New Delhi, INDIA